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Being in a relationship is hard; having ADHD and being in a relationship is harder. Because we have difficulty generalizing— because what we agreed to in one situation doesn’t translate to the next situation that’s caught our attention— partners can become frustrated. Because we have trouble focusing for an extended period of time, it can appear like we’re cold or uncaring. We know that is just not true. We’re interesting. We’re unique. We do care. We just need to communicate better.

The best relationships are partnerships and having ADHD complicates that. Whether in high-school, college, or beyond, ADHD poses a challenge to relationships of all ages. Whether forgetting to call for an important relationship milestone, or something more simple like zoning out in a conversation, ADHD can pose a serious speed-bump— or even roadblock— to a happy relationship. The trick is getting over those speed-bumps or taking a detour around the roadblock. Though it may be frustrating for other people to have to constantly remind us of things, we have to educate them as to why. They may feel as if they’re nagging but they’re actually compensating for our trouble staying on task. In other instances, they may feel like they’re clamping down on us, but they’re actually helpfully taming our less-than-stellar impulse control. We too have to take responsibility— to educate them, and to appreciate the steps they’re taking to help us on our path to mastering our ADHD.

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